Sue and John Corbett
John: Positive ~ Loyal ~ Curious ~ Emotional ~ Passionate ~ Nuanced. BONUS – Intuitive - Ultimately, anxieties and personal decisions, after considering (sometimes worrying about) PROs/CONs, are decided (reconciled) by gut feel
Sue: Empathetic ~ Loving ~ Kind ~ Inquisitive ~ Perpetual learner ~ Passionate
We met when John and Sue moved next door when our son Chris was one year old. We shared driveways for 25 years, and our friendship has lasted over forty years. They are magnets, attracting people from far and wide. Whatever interested them wasn’t enough to participate; they naturally gravitated to higher levels of involvement.
John was a leader of our local scout troop, and that leadership team was probably one of the best in our city’s history. In baseball, John played, coached and served as an administrator.
Sue was a teacher who helped put on the school musicals. I would hear Sue singing inside their house while I was outside. It was refreshing to hear someone so happy that they sang, even without an audience. She has a lovely voice. She eventually worked as a teacher in one of the schools that housed students on the extreme fringes of the system.
Sue and John are excellent sounding boards for me. I have always respected John’s business acumen and consulted with them often about changes or new programs I wanted to implement.
We miss the comraderies we had as next-door neighbours – once, they stole a statue out of our backyard and put it in their garden to see if I would notice – no chance, I sat in their backyard admiring their new statue’s familiarity. It wasn’t until they told me that I realized it was familiar because it was ours. There are many stories I can regale you with, but space limits me. We miss them big time; they were the glue holding our group together. Meet John and Sue in their words.
At some time, you reached a fork in the road. At that time, it didn’t feel like it, but looking back, you realize that was a big moment. One that changed your life. Describe yours.
Sue, “I have had several “forks in the road,” but my biggest one was when John and I married. Not only did I marry my best friend, but I was lucky enough to be with the man who would become a fantastic dad. Family is everything to me, and he has shown me what a great partner in life is all about. I am so fortunate that we have been on the path of life together.”
John, “There are several significant moments it is hard to choose:
· The decision to marry - I mulled over the yes/no responses on a drive home from university. This occurred when I was headed to grad school the following year, and Sue was looking for a teaching position.
· Being fired from Burroughs/Unisys - After a lengthy 20-year career with my first employer, I felt discouraged, unwanted, and inadequate after being let go. (See intuitive below). Once I realized I’d essentially been gifted a 24-month paid vacation, I understood that I (we) would be okay. Incidentally, the heave-ho was delivered 5-10 days after receiving an award for long and good performance (service?).
· Move to Nova Scotia - After 40 years in the Greater Toronto Area “GTA” with “retirement” (for some) on the horizon and fundamental reasons that we belonged at home, our immediate family was in Nova Scotia raising kids with whom we were practically estranged; my mother was aging, and the “kids” practically did not have the time necessary to be with her. This weighed against the realization that most of our friends were the ones we grew up with in Ontario, and I had 5-8 good working years left in my career. I was challenged and thoroughly enjoyed. This came to a head when I realized that with our kids out of the house and not just down the road, some of our friends felt that when their retirement came, they would move away or become estranged while they focused on their evolving family. We’d be alone with little but our navels to reflect upon. The epiphany was mind-numbing.”
What has been your biggest challenge, and how did you overcome it?
Sue, “My biggest challenge has been to believe in myself. I have never felt very comfortable in my skin and my ability to succeed. I am “learning disabled,” which has had a continuing influence on my self-worth.”
John, “I have lived a privileged life so far, so most of my “challenges” are small. There were some medium challenges and some significant challenges. My definition of a challenge is not necessarily negative.
· As an early teen, I learned I was cut while my best friend made a rep hockey team!
· Several medium developments would be the big-ticket decisions, such as moving to Toronto for Grad School, having children and moving from a townhouse to a Semi-detached.
· While a few large ones are getting married, leaving Mississauga, and moving back to Nova Scotia to be with family.
A couple of them caused immense stress from work:
· Being FIRED (let go due to “reorganizing”)
· Being harassed by a far-too-long and rigged poor-work review, which led to termination, only to learn that I was caught up in a male.”
What is one gem you learned on your journey that you would love to share? Alternatively, what would you tell a younger you?
Sue, “Be kind! When you are Fortunate enough to have kindness done for you, pay it forward. Give a coffee to the guy behind you at Tim's. Buy the guy on the street corner a sandwich. It will make the world a better place and fill your heart.”
John, “Things are never as bad as they may seem AND never as good as they may appear.”
John has a number of passions at present - one is the SS Atlantic Heritage