The Essence of Paula Montgomery
Social ~ Caring ~ Empathic
Charitable ~ Considerate ~ Loyal/Loving
It's tough to come up with words to describe yourself. I know all the bad ones - a little bit late sometimes, likes to hit snooze a few times, not a morning person, procrastinates
Whenever Paula walks into a room, she brightens it up. My nickname for her is Sunshine! The words above are not enough: She is passionate and lives a life with purpose; she has joie de vivre and is a force majeure. Paula is fair and righteous. Paula and her husband, Glen, are the biggest advocators for their children, Arwen and Logan. They are superb parents who have dedicated their lives and raised two wonderful children.
Paula has the biggest heart one can imagine. I have known her since she was 4 years old. She is my sister-in-law and fifteen years younger than Donna, the next youngest. At first, she was timid. I remember asking Donna why she was so quiet. Donna chuckled and said, “Just wait.” I waited, and true to Donna’s word, she hasn’t stopped talking since 1974.
She has been involved in Girl Guides of Canada at some level for almost 50 years. It doesn’t stop there; whether it is a wife, mother, sister, Service Club member or hockey mom, she is a positive force and natural magnet that people are attracted to. If someone is wronged, she is their champion. She has an incredible ability to size up the moment and assess the situation to come up with a solution. She does not shy away from a problem when she is needed.
When it came time for me to search for a successor for my business, I head-hunted her; I could not have picked a better person who lives to look after others. She lives a life of purpose—one that cares for others unconditionally. She was the perfect successor. I regret that I had to make a series of business decisions that eliminated her ability to continue as my successor in my business – that was not only my loss but also my client’s loss. Please make no mistake; I made the right move for myself and my clients.
As you read her story, you will see that a betrayal has cost her dearly, but she carried herself with grace beyond words, even after the biggest betrayal one can imagine.
Paula has the most widespread network; there isn’t a place or group where we don’t find a Paula connection. This never ceases to amaze me. She is beloved by all who know her. I can continue as I am her biggest fan and love her immensely. However, space becomes an issue, so meet Paula
At some time, you reached a fork in the road. At that time, it didn’t feel like it, but looking back, you realize it was a big moment. One that changed your life. Describe yours.
I had been dating a guy for a few years on and off, but he didn't want to have more children, so the writing was on the wall. I had met Glen, and we dated on and off for a bit. Then I realized how wonderful Glen was with his dog, Rielly, and I knew he would be a wonderful father.
I was right. Over 21 years married and 23 years together - he has been an excellent partner and a fantastic dad to our two children, Arwen and Logan, and our other dog Zeus (RIP), plus our new four-legged child Maizie. I am forever thankful to Glen for choosing me to be parents together and making me a mom, as that is the best thing I have ever been part of. Together, we have raised Arwen & Logan into the two wonderful human beings that they are. I am excited to watch them with Glen as our children continue with their life and career opportunities.
My brother-in-law, Naguib, caused another life-changing event. He thought I would be excellent as a Financial Advisor. It took me a few years to believe it, but I am thankful he convinced me. I am going on 12 years now, and I could not be happier in this career. I work with a fabulous dealer and have met the most amazing people. Thank you for your mentorship, Naguib, and continuous support and love. Naguib often ends our conversations when I call him for advice or opinion with, “You owe me $250 Bucks.” Naguib, I can now say you owe me $250 for the kind words ;-)
Paula & Tara
What has been your biggest challenge, and how did you overcome it?
My biggest challenge was that my relationship with my mother-in-law was damaged in 2022 - a misunderstanding between her and me. Still, her daughter took the opportunity to destroy any relationship instead of picking the phone up and talking to her brother or me. It was devasting - and it took everything from my soul, and I fell apart this summer, but I have learned a lot now.
I was extremely close to my MIL and had the opportunity to have the relationship with her that I missed out on with my mother when raising my children. This was a blessing for me, and I am so thankful. There is not a day that I don't miss her. My children have been cut off from their cousins, which has been an eye-opener for our family. One simple phone call and all would have been settled, but they chose a different path, which is sad for everyone. I realize now that when someone mistreats you and acts out, you must remember that their insecurity and fear drive their actions.
It has been a rough road for my family, but I know that my Mother-in-law will see the truth one day, and we will reconnect. It just may not be on my timeline. I learned that I am not defined by how people treat me but by how I choose to respond.
What is one gem you learned on your journey that you would love to share? Alternatively, what hint would you tell a younger version of yourself?
When others treat you poorly, it is their issue. Instead of taking their actions personally, try to empathize and understand that their behaviour reflects their turmoil.
Surround yourself with positive people and remember your worth. Counselling never hurts, communication is essential, and having a great circle of friends and laughing lots is vital for mental health. I would tell my younger self to be active, remain active and avoid sugar and drama. Look after your mental health ALWAYS, as it is the key!
